How To Avoid Getting Regifted

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how-to-avoid-getting-regifted

How To Avoid Getting Regifted

Some people are so easy to shop for. The better you know someone, the easier it usually is to get them something that will bring a smile on Christmas morning.

The flip side of this is when you are unfamiliar with the person for whom you are shopping. Secret Santa arrangements at work or school can lead to shopping for someone who you barely know.

The more diligent among us will do a bit of digging to find the right gift. In some cases, we might find ourselves a bit too busy and harried to dig for the perfect gift for someone who we barely know.

A knee-jerk reaction might be to grab something completely random and hope for the best. This is a bad idea.

Even the random recipient of a Secret Santa present is holding out the hope that the person who drew their name will put some consideration into the gift. So, let’s take a look at some of the categories to avoid.

Don’t Get Too Personal

Once upon a time, I received some nail clippers as a Christmas gift. They were kindly intended but ewww. Way, way, way too personal. Gifts of a very personal nature are appropriate for parents to purchase for their kids or, to some extent, for kids to get their parents.

Back in the day, it was a given that my mom wanted Wind Song and/or Dearfoam slipper booties. That’s what she wanted and I knew because she told me. That was a safe present for her child to get her.

She didn’t want that from a second cousin, once removed at the family Pollyanna.

She didn’t want it from somebody who pulled her name out of a Secret Santa hat at work.

Neither does anyone else.

You do want to get something that is personal in the sense that it speaks to the recipient’s interests. If it’s well known that they like certain animals, a particular TV show or sports team, that’s an appropriate level of personal gift-giving.

Deodorant, socks, underwear, even slippers are on the list of frequently returned gifts. Why? Too personal.

Honestly, there’s actually a broad swath between thoughtful and creepily inappropriate. Don’t go there unless a wish list was included with the Secret Santa name draw.


Gifts So Personal You Could Never Regift

Don’t Be Inconsiderate

You don’t want to get a gift that can be misinterpreted. All gifts have a subtext that can lead to unintended offense:

  • Exercise goods might suggest that you think the person is unfit
  • Clothes might suggest you think the person is unfashionable
  • Perfume might suggest you think the person smells badly

If you don’t have the time or inclination to find out what your recipient actually would like, there are relatively neutral gifts you can select.

A non-religious holiday decoration is reasonably safe. Items that have candy cane stripes, snowflake or snowman motifs, solid color baubles or things of this sort are quite neutral.

Depending on your location, winter accessories are also a safe bet. Ice scrapers, pocket hand warmers, mittens or earmuffs are useful and considerate.

Picture frames, scrapbooks or other innocuous objects that the recipient can personalize are a thoughtful option. Even if you don’t know what they like, they do. Giving someone a picture frame for their desk affords them the opportunity to put a picture of a loved one, family member(s) or a beloved pet front and center.


3 Gift-Giving Tips from Social Psychology

Do No Harm

Finally, it’s usually safe and considerate to simply resort to candy, alcohol or foodstuffs. Naturally, it’s a potential disaster if your recipient is diabetic, a recovering alcoholic or allergic to whatever you might provide. Nut allergies can lead to life-threatening reactions.

Given that you don’t know your recipient well enough to know what they actually want for Christmas, it’s also possible that you don’t know them well enough to know that what you’re planning to give them could cause dreadful, lasting harm.

Of course, harm doesn’t need to be merely physical. Giving a gift box of meats and cheeses is a classic gift that’s generally thought of as a holiday staple but not if your recipient is vegan. That could be treated as harassment if your recipient believed that you knew they were philosophically opposed to the gift you choose.


When you want to give a gift that’s sure to please, mind the ideas above. It’s no coincidence that these types of gifts are the most frequently returned, regifted or simply tossed in the trash. Be sure to do some detective work in order to learn what the people on your shopping list really want so you can avoid getting regifted.